here come the words of a truly drunken man
i am but the teapot of a decomposing australian. i live to eat semi-deranged minutions in time of great strife so that those who have any possibility of survival may inherit the world.
if you think i am in any way kidding you have but to look at my record of decisive immunity in the face of fact.
that is all.
ps. every word was thought up and brought to being immediately on the spot with the aid of large amounts of alcohol.